We Can't Deliver the Flowers Because The House Is A Crime Scene

This post is inspired by See Mom Run by Beth Feldman, a compilation of funny parenting stories by bloggers and writers (many of whom I know!), and the latest book choice for the Silicon Valley Moms Blog book club.

Our life was crazy when Li'l Boo was born, and in a lot of ways it has never let up (Hello! Four moves in four years?) At the time, we were living in Silicon Valley and had purchased a new home when I was six months pregnant. Unfortunately, the house needed a lot of work before being "liveable" and as a result had to wait until we had a working sink, toilet and shower before moving in. I remember my mom calling me to say "You are nine months pregnant - MOVE INTO THAT HOUSE." So we moved the following weekend . . . little did we know that would be our only weekend sans baby as Li'l Boo arrived early, just four days later.

Well, our second night in the new home we received a phone call from our previous building manager letting us know that there had been an arson fire at our old complex (seriously, the only crime we heard of during our five years living there - HAPPENED TO US - the day after we move out). The fire was in the carport area, our neighbors cars were destroyed (thank goodness we had moved with our car already!), the external walls of our bedrooms were burned, and the fire department had hacked into our place with axes to fight the fire as we weren't there and the doors were locked. Fortunately the only things we lost that night were our bikes, and a twelve pack of diet Dr. Pepper. No one was hurt.

The whole middle-of-the-night event was shocking to us and the community. We lived in a small, quiet town on the peninsula and rarely heard sirens. The kind of place where stores leave signs on their doors that say "Gone to Hawaii, will re-open in a month upon our return" and nothing would happen to the place in their absence. We caught the story of the arson fire on the local news that night (still have it on Tivo), and could not believe how lucky we were to have moved that weekend so we weren't in the place when the explosion and fire occured. I had visions of me being wheeled away via ambulance, mentioned as part of the news story ("one pregnant resident was taken to the hospital"). I'm sure I would have given birth that night had we been there from the shock of it all! That was Sunday.

Now in between having a baby, moving out of my office in Menlo Park, buying a new home in the South Bay and remodeling it so we could move in, my hubby was unhappy at work and weighing staying at the job or taking a new one, with recruiters knocking on his door regularly. We decided that since I was pregnant that he needed to keep his same job and wait to jump ship until I was back at work. Keep some stability and health insurance - right?

Well . . .he was actually scheduled to head to Seattle that Thursday for a day of interviews, until I awoke at 3 a.m. Thursday morning feeling ill and uncomfortable. (In hindsight, I was having contractions, but what did I know - I wasn't in pain like I had spent months fearing.) I drank some water, but didn't feel any better, so we drove over to the hospital - where I then feared walking into the ER and having them send me back home, so we sat in the car in the hospital parking lot and I drank water and we discussed the full moon. (Perhaps the reason for our craziness?) My uncomfortableness subsided and we drove home and fell asleep after c2cDad called the HR rep to reschedule the day of interviews. They were rescheduled for the next day.

Li'l Boo arrived Thursday night, so suffice it to say c2cDad had to call back to reschedule his interviews for a second time. Only this time, he had to admit that we just had a baby (not wanting to divulge personal family info during the initial interview process, it never came up until this point). They were congratulatory and surprised that he even scheduled a day trip so close to the due date (though really, Li'l Boo was just early). Yes, I am a great wifey.

My in-laws arrived from out of town a few days later and the newly rescheduled interview day rolls around. c2cDad flew up for his interviews and called me around mid-day somewhat panicked "is everything ok at the house?"

"Uhm, yeah. Everything's fine, why?"

"Well," c2cDad responds "I just spoke with the HR manager here, and they said they sent flowers to the house, but were told they were undeliverable. The delivery driver just called them to say the address was a crime scene and she couldn't leave the flowers."

At that moment we both realized what had happened. I laughed my first big belly laugh since giving birth. Of course! In the midst of everything else, c2cDad hadn't had time to update his resume with our new address, so they had our old one - the location of the fire. Sure enough, there was "Do Not Cross" crime scene tape hanging around the place.

I can only imagine what the HR team and hiring team must have thought, and it makes me laugh all over again. An interview candidate calls to reschedule his interviews twice, and his address is marked a crime scene. I'd be thinking, "Who is this guy? That's a likely story - this guy had to reschedule because he was in jail" or something along those lines. . . as an HR rep, what goes through your mind when you do something nice for a job candidate, and you're called saying it can't be delivered because they're home has police tape around it?

Oh, fresh flowers arrived to our new home the next day and were genuinely appreciated. I was impressed that they sent them in the first place and bet they've all added this story to their rolodex of work stories that they share over laughs.

Comments

[Jennifer/Connect with your Teens]

Great story. I have a lot of trouble writing about my own stories, and especially making them funny. That is why I had to just share some of the stories from the book in my post.

[Desiree @ Writing to Sanity]

This is the same kind of stuff that happens to me. Made me LOL. I'll be sharing this one with my friends tomorrow. ;)

[Julie]

Seriously ROTFL. What a marathon of craziness. Great story!

...so did your husband get the job?

[Rox]

SO funny! I hope he got the job (if he wanted it after all that weird karma)!!!

[April]

Oh, yes, I want to know if he got the job, too!